In the olden days, writers went to school to learn their grammar. There were standard English rules and a dictionary, maybe two. Then dictionaries went online, and more companies decided that they wanted to be the deciders of what words went into English language and which didn’t. Fair enough – competition is healthy.
Now there are Apps to assist writers, Grammarly being one of the popular ones. Seemingly now though, Grammarly will point out if your chosen word fits the PC norms, and will inform you if you’ve made an error in word choice. The list of their approved words are here. GLAAD-Media-Reference-Guide-Tenth-Edition . Use them at your pearl.